Please pray for me at the moment as I'm trying to forgive some things from my past... There were things that went on while I was in high school - in my family, at school, with friendships, with relationships, and so on. Well many of these things, I have had to work through and, because of the grace and mercy of God, I have been able to grow past them.
However, one of the hardest things that I have had to learn to do is forgive those who have hurt me in different ways. A few of them who were closest to me, I have been able to come to a point within myself that I can forgive and forget and move on from what they did (in their respective ways) to make things painful for me. Even though I may never actually get a chance to verbalize that forgiveness I have, I know that I can have rest in my soul knowing that I was able to let God move in me. I no longer hold hurtful grudges there. However, there is one in particular person whom I went to high school with that I looked up to as a good Christ-following role model. Suddenly, without warning, this person not only cut me off and cut off our friendship, but they did that with all of our friends around us. Even now, I still have passerby moments with this person, and it hurts every time because I feel like I'm not important enough to even notice or care for.
What hurts the most is that I looked to this person as different from the rest and really respected them. Surely, I was not exactly the perfect person in high school and struggled with belonging and whatnot, but I still saw this person as almost a guiding light that I wasn't used to because of the presence of Christ in their life. I, to this day, have no clue what I did that was so horrible.. they felt the need to end our friendship without rhyme or reason and never talk to me again. To be honest, they really killed their witness to me. They killed the picture of grace and patience and understanding and enduring faith that I once saw within them and eventually, in my hurt, those images turned to thoughts of bitterness and images of this person as being self-centered and judgmental.
Well it has been about four years since I actually had any sort of relationship with this person. The forgiving process started long ago and I've truly been working on it, but I can't seem to reach the point of absolute forgiveness... And I can't figure out why? Maybe I need closure from that side? I never really understood what exactly happened, so maybe I just need to know what I did to deserve this? Maybe I want to hear an apology? I don't know. But I have really been feeling the urge to take this person aside one day to talk to about what went on, explain the hurt it caused me, and see where God leads the conversation. I don't think there will be much hope for rekindling a relationship any time soon, but I know I would like to settle whatever went wrong. It's been really hard living with this on my heart these past few years. And every time I ask God to provide a time for me to talk with this person, He gives it and I coward out. I think ultimately, because I don't want to be hurt by whatever goes on. I also know that, when I feel hurt by a person, my natural defense mechanism is to become cold and get really rigid and defensive when I come into contact with them. I need to talk to this person soon though, before I simply don't have a chance and I always feel that wrong and disgraceful bitterness towards them.
So please pray for me... pray that God will truly continue to work within me, showing me how to have grace in this forgiving process. Pray that He will indeed equip me with the right amount of courage to face this person and work through what went on in the past. Pray that He continues to grow my well of forgiveness into a greater forge with room for every ounce of forgiveness that I need to give. Pray that whatever I learn from this process and trial will be fruitful in other ways, so that someday I can pour this same wisdom into someone else who needs to face a similar problem. Pray that exactly the right words that I need to say to this person will come out in a way that doesn't offend, that my heart will remain softened for room for growing, that this persons heart would not be hard towards me, nor offensive toward me either. Please pray for me, for me to have the courage to face that which brings me down and keeps me from growing closer to God. Please pray for me. Thanks...
Thursday, February 21, 2013
Tuesday, February 19, 2013
The Brightest Lights (Name Change)
Hello everyone!
As many of you know who read my blogs and have been reading them for the past year and a half, I love blogging! It is one of my favorite past-times! Whether I am actually typing one up to publish the next day or whether I am catching up on some reading of blogs that I follow, Blogger is something that is always up on my screen.
I have been very cautious and particular about how often I blog and how often I am on blogger. While it's on my computer screen most days of the week, I limit myself to writing no more than 3 posts a week, and maybe an extra one for my Craft Room blog. Maybe that sounds like a lot to some of you, but there was a time (last summer) when I would write two or three entries a day, every day, for a few weeks... And I realized I needed to cool it down a bit. So I did. Now I have limitations on how often I blog and so on :)
Well looking at the title, I will explain. Lately, I have been listening to a lot of new undiscovered music (per usual) and one of my favorite songs at the moment is called "Brightest Lights" by King Charles (feat. Mumford & Sons). The entry line to the song, and overall the chorus, says, "The brightest lights cast the darkest shadows and that's where I'll be found..." and other words to follow. Well. Regardless of whatever the song is truly about (I don't think I've really been closely paying attention to what I've been singing - nothing bad - but you know how sometimes you learn the words to a song mindlessly just because you hear it a lot and then sudden;y one day you realize what exactly the song is talking about?) I have really been thinking about just that one line in a lot of different ways. Not because it has been comin' out my stereo system, but because the vision I get has been resounding throughout my mind the past few days.
When I started this blog, I called it "Fly From the Highest Swing" also named after a song called "Dream" by Priscilla Ahn. The reason I chose it as the title is because of the song itself. The song recounts the innocence of a little girl who has dreams of many things and at one point she says, "I had a dream that I could fly from the highest swing, I had a dream!" And later, changing the words a bit, she says, "I had a dream that I could fly from the highest tree, I had a dream!" And the whole idea behind it is that she had such a powerful imagination that she dreamed of flying from the swing - if only she could get high enough! Same thing for the rest of the song, she had a blossoming imagination that ultimately, in the end of the song, helps her look back on her life to say, "I've lived it full and I've lived it well, as many tales I've lived to tell I'm ready now to fly from the highest swing... I had a dream." Such power and dolce. And that same kind of sweet and powerful, overwhelming innocence that couldn't hold back her inner-most being was the same kind of feeling I wish I could have felt more often as a child. So I figured that, by writing to my heart's content about whatever I so choose, I could feel that invigorating feeling of swinging so high that if I could get just high enough... I could fly from it. I wanted to feel that I was able to release that energy into writing, and sharing it with the world.
While this is still the reflection I want to have with my blog, blogging thoughts and opinions, interests and hobbies, I have grown a lot through my writing and I have come to a place where I feel a name change can be representative of what change I feel has been made.
The Brightest Lights is the name I am choosing to change my blog title to. It's feels to me just as free as Fly From the Highest Swing, but instead speaks from the growing part of me. While Fly From the Highest Swing meant to me the innocence within getting out and feeling release, that little Jessica has grown up a little in the past year and a half and now she's thinking more along the lines of using the same inspiration she's been having to make an impact. If that makes sense. Although shadows are not permanent, everyone sees where the shadows lie. Although not permanent, everyone can see where there are bright lights. And according to my calling, if I'm to be a Light in a Dark place, then I feel that the name suits :)
Not that it's an entirely big deal to anyone, but that everyone can know where my writing heart is at the moment and also understand that they are really reading the same blog as before.
In Christ Alone,
Jessica
As many of you know who read my blogs and have been reading them for the past year and a half, I love blogging! It is one of my favorite past-times! Whether I am actually typing one up to publish the next day or whether I am catching up on some reading of blogs that I follow, Blogger is something that is always up on my screen.
I have been very cautious and particular about how often I blog and how often I am on blogger. While it's on my computer screen most days of the week, I limit myself to writing no more than 3 posts a week, and maybe an extra one for my Craft Room blog. Maybe that sounds like a lot to some of you, but there was a time (last summer) when I would write two or three entries a day, every day, for a few weeks... And I realized I needed to cool it down a bit. So I did. Now I have limitations on how often I blog and so on :)
 |
| The brightest lights cast the darkest shadows.... (Taken by yours truly!) |
When I started this blog, I called it "Fly From the Highest Swing" also named after a song called "Dream" by Priscilla Ahn. The reason I chose it as the title is because of the song itself. The song recounts the innocence of a little girl who has dreams of many things and at one point she says, "I had a dream that I could fly from the highest swing, I had a dream!" And later, changing the words a bit, she says, "I had a dream that I could fly from the highest tree, I had a dream!" And the whole idea behind it is that she had such a powerful imagination that she dreamed of flying from the swing - if only she could get high enough! Same thing for the rest of the song, she had a blossoming imagination that ultimately, in the end of the song, helps her look back on her life to say, "I've lived it full and I've lived it well, as many tales I've lived to tell I'm ready now to fly from the highest swing... I had a dream." Such power and dolce. And that same kind of sweet and powerful, overwhelming innocence that couldn't hold back her inner-most being was the same kind of feeling I wish I could have felt more often as a child. So I figured that, by writing to my heart's content about whatever I so choose, I could feel that invigorating feeling of swinging so high that if I could get just high enough... I could fly from it. I wanted to feel that I was able to release that energy into writing, and sharing it with the world.
While this is still the reflection I want to have with my blog, blogging thoughts and opinions, interests and hobbies, I have grown a lot through my writing and I have come to a place where I feel a name change can be representative of what change I feel has been made.
The Brightest Lights is the name I am choosing to change my blog title to. It's feels to me just as free as Fly From the Highest Swing, but instead speaks from the growing part of me. While Fly From the Highest Swing meant to me the innocence within getting out and feeling release, that little Jessica has grown up a little in the past year and a half and now she's thinking more along the lines of using the same inspiration she's been having to make an impact. If that makes sense. Although shadows are not permanent, everyone sees where the shadows lie. Although not permanent, everyone can see where there are bright lights. And according to my calling, if I'm to be a Light in a Dark place, then I feel that the name suits :)
Not that it's an entirely big deal to anyone, but that everyone can know where my writing heart is at the moment and also understand that they are really reading the same blog as before.
In Christ Alone,
Jessica
Collecting: Vintage Japanese Stackable Coffee Mugs
Over Christmas Break, I worked at my hometown's Habitat ReStore as a volunteer. While I was there, I saw AMAZING things come through that I wish I could have bought and taken home with me! There were a few things, however, that I was able to grab after a few days of shelf life. I love everything I have now lying around my apartment, but what are my favorites?
These!
I love these little guys SO much! I saw them come through, watched nervously to make sure no one bought them, and when the time was right... I went for the prowl! And I love them!
Something about them, I noticed, when I checked the brand that's usually at the bottom is that all it says is "Japan." Nothing else. And it's etched in. So I started searching around the web, hoping that I'd find some answers (I wanted more and didn't know where to get them) and discovered that they were made in the 1960's and 1970's as part of a stylish household trend. They are 'stackable' mugs:
And they can apparently be found in mostly antique stores everywhere as well as random thrift stores. These here, I got for $.25 each! And other people I have been able to find on the web have said they've found theirs for similar prices.
I love these little mugs so much and I have started searching around to find more to add to my collection! They come in all sorts of colors (blue, orange, brown, green, red, black, brown) and all different designs (flowers, patterns, sun, circles, zigzags, squares). I will never pay a ridiculous amount for them (i.e. $3 for 2) I'd say no more than $.50 - that'll make the hunt more fun! I'm pumped and I can't wait to find more!
These!
I love these little guys SO much! I saw them come through, watched nervously to make sure no one bought them, and when the time was right... I went for the prowl! And I love them!
Something about them, I noticed, when I checked the brand that's usually at the bottom is that all it says is "Japan." Nothing else. And it's etched in. So I started searching around the web, hoping that I'd find some answers (I wanted more and didn't know where to get them) and discovered that they were made in the 1960's and 1970's as part of a stylish household trend. They are 'stackable' mugs:
And they can apparently be found in mostly antique stores everywhere as well as random thrift stores. These here, I got for $.25 each! And other people I have been able to find on the web have said they've found theirs for similar prices.
I love these little mugs so much and I have started searching around to find more to add to my collection! They come in all sorts of colors (blue, orange, brown, green, red, black, brown) and all different designs (flowers, patterns, sun, circles, zigzags, squares). I will never pay a ridiculous amount for them (i.e. $3 for 2) I'd say no more than $.50 - that'll make the hunt more fun! I'm pumped and I can't wait to find more!
Monday, February 18, 2013
Rusted Rustic Beauty
Since I've gotten a computer of my own again, I have been unloading months of picture taking into my photo files! Some pictures that I never realized I still had were taken last summer while I was doing yard work with my family. Not to sound like I'm bragging, but I was amazed at how well I did with the pictures I took! One of my favorites right now is this one:
It's currently the background on my desktop. I'm always wary of putting good personal art on the internet. I write short-stories that aren't too shabby, I write Bible studies, I take lots of pictures, I refurbish and paint furniture, I do a lot of things that if I were to put them online, someone might copy it and claim it as their own - I know people who are like that and I know people who have had this happen to them. But I decided to share this with the world.
The house I grew up in was built circa 1830 and a lot of antique furniture is still inside as well as other memorabilia. We still have brick fire places, stone hearths, brick chimneys, lightning rods (a million of them!) and other buildings on the property. We have the outdoor kitchen still on the lot (before we had fire codes, the kitchen was kept separate from the house in case of something setting on fire), we have a smoke house where they used to smoke the meats, we have two huge barns (one for the horses and cattle, one for the buggies when they came around), there's a blacksmith shop (it's covered in greens, but everything inside is still in tact), there's even a chicken coupe. My family used to own a huge chunk of land in South Carolina, but were land-brokers and sold much of it. Now, the street that my family's house is on is made up of family members - some close in relation, some distant. This bench is most definitely from the 20th century, but as for the age... I would put it somewhere between the 1960s and the 1980s. Either way, this rusted rustic beauty has never been more photogenic :)
It's currently the background on my desktop. I'm always wary of putting good personal art on the internet. I write short-stories that aren't too shabby, I write Bible studies, I take lots of pictures, I refurbish and paint furniture, I do a lot of things that if I were to put them online, someone might copy it and claim it as their own - I know people who are like that and I know people who have had this happen to them. But I decided to share this with the world.
The house I grew up in was built circa 1830 and a lot of antique furniture is still inside as well as other memorabilia. We still have brick fire places, stone hearths, brick chimneys, lightning rods (a million of them!) and other buildings on the property. We have the outdoor kitchen still on the lot (before we had fire codes, the kitchen was kept separate from the house in case of something setting on fire), we have a smoke house where they used to smoke the meats, we have two huge barns (one for the horses and cattle, one for the buggies when they came around), there's a blacksmith shop (it's covered in greens, but everything inside is still in tact), there's even a chicken coupe. My family used to own a huge chunk of land in South Carolina, but were land-brokers and sold much of it. Now, the street that my family's house is on is made up of family members - some close in relation, some distant. This bench is most definitely from the 20th century, but as for the age... I would put it somewhere between the 1960s and the 1980s. Either way, this rusted rustic beauty has never been more photogenic :)
Monday, February 11, 2013
Another Update Before I Get Back To Real Blogging!
I should be able to start blogging again! My fixed and complete computer will be received by me today! I am so excited!! Renewed warranty and everything!
Well some updates over the past two months:
We got married!!! January 7th, 2013 was the date of our wedding! We are learning now how to live with someone completely different from ourselves. But it's been so wonderful being able to come home after class and work everyday to the person who loves me the most, to know my best friend is waiting for me! :)
Started the second semester of my junior year in college. I have no classes on Monday or Friday, and the only class I have on Wednesday starts at 6:30pm.
I've applied to 13 jobs on campus now and I have kind of heard back from two of them as positive. Five of the positions I applied for, I was told that I wasn't what they were looking for, Three of them, I haven't heard back from at all and they already found someone for the position (thanks for letting me know). And the last one I applied for was last week working for Admissions. This has been the job I've really been wanting since I started school here in 2010... I really hope they at least call me in for an interview, I would really really love to work for them... Please pray! God knows what is best for me and what Frank and I need to stay afloat financially.
I've discovered the Homemaker in me and I am loving being one and being a wife! I really wish I didn't have to go to school and I could just stay at home to clean and then work a little on the side, but I've got to keep heart and stay motivated! I have two semesters left after this one, plus a few summer classes. I need prayer to keep me sane O.O
Future Exploits:
Frank has felt the call to teaching! Right now, he will be finishing before me, taking what time I have left in school to work a heck of lot and pay off some debt. Once I'm done (depending on what we decide to do) we will either spend an extra semester or two here at our Undergrad school and I will start Grad school classes in the College of Counseling (it's my dream to be a counselor for troubled youth and their families in crisis). Or, once I graduate, we will up and move to Texas where Frank will go to Baylor University to receive his Masters and Ph. D. in History so that he can teach British History on the college level (preferably at CIU when they install the History program). So we are working towards a lot right now, but we will not move without God moving us first!
Some of you may be asking "what about Sweden? Weren't you called to Sweden?" Yes, we were, and we still are. Right now, getting to Sweden is a matter of when will God provide for us the opportunity to go. You see, in Sweden, they don't take you seriously if a) you don't have a degree and b) if you come as a missionary without any other reason for being there. In Sweden, college education is free. If you don't get a college degree, they think you're lazy, they don't take you seriously, and they think you really don't know what you're talking about. However, they also don't like snobby know-it-all's. On top of that, if you come in there saying something like, "you need a relationship with Christ! I'm here to bring you to Him so He can save you!" they will definitely not take you seriously, and probably even laugh at you. So if you come with a degree and experience in your field, get to know people by earning their respect, build relationships, then you can start ministering in the simplest ways. Sometimes, the most effective ministry is living like Christ, not talking about Him. So right now, God is calling us to higher education so we can get some professional experience before going to a country that needs to me revived of His true presence.
Right now, I'm dreading my Psychology class in which the grade average of the classes history is a C- because the prof purposely makes it tough. Joy. I'm not even going to try to aim for an A because I'll be depressed when I don't get one. The ONLY grades in the class are 4 (four) exam grades. That's it. No other grades. And each exam is 50 questions. He told us this: in 35 years of him giving the same exams each year, there have only been 2 (two) students to make a 100. Only two students in 35 years (think about roughly 250 students every year coming through his class) have made a 100 on any of his exams. So I'm aiming low to save my self-confidence, but I'm still going to work hard. Lord, help me.
So once I get my own computer again, I will be sure to post something truly worthy of a blog! I'm so excited! Oh Blogger, how I've missed you!
Stay classy planet Earth... and thanks for stopping by.
-Ron Burgundy and Veronica Corningstone
Well some updates over the past two months:
We got married!!! January 7th, 2013 was the date of our wedding! We are learning now how to live with someone completely different from ourselves. But it's been so wonderful being able to come home after class and work everyday to the person who loves me the most, to know my best friend is waiting for me! :)
Started the second semester of my junior year in college. I have no classes on Monday or Friday, and the only class I have on Wednesday starts at 6:30pm.
I've applied to 13 jobs on campus now and I have kind of heard back from two of them as positive. Five of the positions I applied for, I was told that I wasn't what they were looking for, Three of them, I haven't heard back from at all and they already found someone for the position (thanks for letting me know). And the last one I applied for was last week working for Admissions. This has been the job I've really been wanting since I started school here in 2010... I really hope they at least call me in for an interview, I would really really love to work for them... Please pray! God knows what is best for me and what Frank and I need to stay afloat financially.
I've discovered the Homemaker in me and I am loving being one and being a wife! I really wish I didn't have to go to school and I could just stay at home to clean and then work a little on the side, but I've got to keep heart and stay motivated! I have two semesters left after this one, plus a few summer classes. I need prayer to keep me sane O.O
Future Exploits:
Frank has felt the call to teaching! Right now, he will be finishing before me, taking what time I have left in school to work a heck of lot and pay off some debt. Once I'm done (depending on what we decide to do) we will either spend an extra semester or two here at our Undergrad school and I will start Grad school classes in the College of Counseling (it's my dream to be a counselor for troubled youth and their families in crisis). Or, once I graduate, we will up and move to Texas where Frank will go to Baylor University to receive his Masters and Ph. D. in History so that he can teach British History on the college level (preferably at CIU when they install the History program). So we are working towards a lot right now, but we will not move without God moving us first!
Some of you may be asking "what about Sweden? Weren't you called to Sweden?" Yes, we were, and we still are. Right now, getting to Sweden is a matter of when will God provide for us the opportunity to go. You see, in Sweden, they don't take you seriously if a) you don't have a degree and b) if you come as a missionary without any other reason for being there. In Sweden, college education is free. If you don't get a college degree, they think you're lazy, they don't take you seriously, and they think you really don't know what you're talking about. However, they also don't like snobby know-it-all's. On top of that, if you come in there saying something like, "you need a relationship with Christ! I'm here to bring you to Him so He can save you!" they will definitely not take you seriously, and probably even laugh at you. So if you come with a degree and experience in your field, get to know people by earning their respect, build relationships, then you can start ministering in the simplest ways. Sometimes, the most effective ministry is living like Christ, not talking about Him. So right now, God is calling us to higher education so we can get some professional experience before going to a country that needs to me revived of His true presence.
Right now, I'm dreading my Psychology class in which the grade average of the classes history is a C- because the prof purposely makes it tough. Joy. I'm not even going to try to aim for an A because I'll be depressed when I don't get one. The ONLY grades in the class are 4 (four) exam grades. That's it. No other grades. And each exam is 50 questions. He told us this: in 35 years of him giving the same exams each year, there have only been 2 (two) students to make a 100. Only two students in 35 years (think about roughly 250 students every year coming through his class) have made a 100 on any of his exams. So I'm aiming low to save my self-confidence, but I'm still going to work hard. Lord, help me.
So once I get my own computer again, I will be sure to post something truly worthy of a blog! I'm so excited! Oh Blogger, how I've missed you!
Stay classy planet Earth... and thanks for stopping by.
-Ron Burgundy and Veronica Corningstone
Tuesday, December 18, 2012
Waiting List ( and Playlist)
In the meantime, while I'm waiting on my laptop to be fixed, I am able to use my mom's desktop over my Christmas Break home (for the last time!) I can't access it every day, but I can from time to time!
So in the meantime, I have developed a playlist that's keeping me occupied while I finish packing to move in to our new apartment! Frank and I will be getting married in 21 days and I am PUMPED! We signed for our apartment last Thursday - a monumental milestone. I stayed there the first two nights working from 8 in the morning until 2-3 in the morning next day trying to get as much unpacked and situated as I can in order for him to live in a clean apartment for the next few weeks and minimize the 'to-do' list once I get back. For now, he's living in our little home and will be until I get there at the beginning of January. Then, he'll spend the rest of our break with his parents one last time and I'll rest for a few days before the wedding. Great planning on our part ;)
So anyways! Here's the playlist:
Other things I'm waiting for include my foot and a job.
About my foot: I think that in all the moving up and down flights and flights of stairs carrying all sorts of heavy and light items, putting pressure on my feet that usually isn't there, I have managed to fracture the bottom of my foot. It's in the ball area under my fourth toe on my right foot. Great to know, right? Well I look like I'm limping when I walk because it really hurts :( I first figured it was just an aggravated nerve because of all the heavy lifting and whatnot. I broke my tailbone last summer and I have problems with nerves in my limbs when I lay on hard ground or on my back the wrong way or twist my hips a certain way, so I just assumed it was an aggravated nerve or something. Well it hasn't gone away and after looking up the symptoms, it is possible that I could have fractured my bone - the one that is conveniently right inside my foot so that I can't actually mend it. So I'm waiting on that to heal :) This is the guide I'm following, among other minor details from other sources, on how to basically home-treat my foot while it is probably healing:
http://www.wendyalbrecht.com/PDFs/technicalWriting/footfracture.pdf
I have a job, currently, but I feel like I'm getting tired of it. That's not me whining, that's me feeling like it's time for me to move on to something different. I am thankful to have a job and I will not quit it until I know for certain that there will be a job waiting for me when it comes time for me to leave my current one. It's been hard finding one though, so I have not had any luck :/ Maybe God is telling me to stay content for just a little longer because He has something better coming for me :) I guess we'll see.
Other than that, I am ready for the wedding to come so that all of this stress and planning can just be over!!! I'm also excited to be marrying my best friend whom I love so dearly and I am thankful that the Lord is TRULY the center and strings of our relationship - and we don't just say that.
Those are updates for the time being! Enjoy the playlist! I hope I get my computer back soon..... :'(
So in the meantime, I have developed a playlist that's keeping me occupied while I finish packing to move in to our new apartment! Frank and I will be getting married in 21 days and I am PUMPED! We signed for our apartment last Thursday - a monumental milestone. I stayed there the first two nights working from 8 in the morning until 2-3 in the morning next day trying to get as much unpacked and situated as I can in order for him to live in a clean apartment for the next few weeks and minimize the 'to-do' list once I get back. For now, he's living in our little home and will be until I get there at the beginning of January. Then, he'll spend the rest of our break with his parents one last time and I'll rest for a few days before the wedding. Great planning on our part ;)
So anyways! Here's the playlist:
- Heartlines by Florence + the Machine (she never gets old for me)
- Puzzle Pieces by Saint Motel
- I Follow Rivers by Lykke Li
- Nail In My Coffin by The Kills
- Cough Syrup by Young the Giant
- Do You Remember by Ane Brun
- Echo Chambers by Parts & Labor
- Mowgli's Road by Marina and the Diamonds
- So Far From Your Weapon by The Dead Weather
- Carry Me by Old Crow Medicine Show
- What You Know by Two Door Cinema Club
- Pumped Up Kicks by Foster The People
- Empire State of Mind by Jay-Z featuring Alicia Keys
- Work by Down With Webster
- Prowl by Dan Auerbach
- Red Paint by Matt & Kim
- Murder of Crows by Lindi Ortega
- Anna Sun by Walk The Moon
- Breath of Life by Florence + the Machine
- Psychotic Girl by The Black Keys
Other things I'm waiting for include my foot and a job.
About my foot: I think that in all the moving up and down flights and flights of stairs carrying all sorts of heavy and light items, putting pressure on my feet that usually isn't there, I have managed to fracture the bottom of my foot. It's in the ball area under my fourth toe on my right foot. Great to know, right? Well I look like I'm limping when I walk because it really hurts :( I first figured it was just an aggravated nerve because of all the heavy lifting and whatnot. I broke my tailbone last summer and I have problems with nerves in my limbs when I lay on hard ground or on my back the wrong way or twist my hips a certain way, so I just assumed it was an aggravated nerve or something. Well it hasn't gone away and after looking up the symptoms, it is possible that I could have fractured my bone - the one that is conveniently right inside my foot so that I can't actually mend it. So I'm waiting on that to heal :) This is the guide I'm following, among other minor details from other sources, on how to basically home-treat my foot while it is probably healing:
http://www.wendyalbrecht.com/PDFs/technicalWriting/footfracture.pdf
I have a job, currently, but I feel like I'm getting tired of it. That's not me whining, that's me feeling like it's time for me to move on to something different. I am thankful to have a job and I will not quit it until I know for certain that there will be a job waiting for me when it comes time for me to leave my current one. It's been hard finding one though, so I have not had any luck :/ Maybe God is telling me to stay content for just a little longer because He has something better coming for me :) I guess we'll see.
Other than that, I am ready for the wedding to come so that all of this stress and planning can just be over!!! I'm also excited to be marrying my best friend whom I love so dearly and I am thankful that the Lord is TRULY the center and strings of our relationship - and we don't just say that.
Those are updates for the time being! Enjoy the playlist! I hope I get my computer back soon..... :'(
Sunday, December 9, 2012
For anyone who is wondering...
In case anyone has wondered where I have been here on blogger... I hate to say it... but... my computer died.... :( yes it did...
It kept freezing up and the only way to unfreeze it was to force a shut down. After a few weeks of this happening, I opened a word document for class and it froze... I got upset. Forced a shut down. Flipped it over. Pulled out the battery. Unplugged it from the wall. then I took a breath...... Plugged it back in. Put the battery back in. Turned it back on.... "Your hard disk does not exist"..... Me: whhhhaaaaattt!?!?!?! It was just there!!!
So... I took it to Best Buy to see if there was anything to be done. They let me know that if it was still under warranty, they would be able to send it in to HP and either my deffective motherboard or my defective hard drive would be replaced for free. Or both if both were the problem. Phew! My warranty runs out at the end of December!! Great, so how much would it cost to extract my data? I have so much that I don't want to risk losing if they replace something. "$220" O.O Are you kidding me??? I asked him, "why does it cost so much?" His reply: "People love their data. It's important to people." I laughed (at) him and said, "woooww... that's really wrong...." :) So basically, greed is evident even in a squad of geeks. Taking advantage of people who have things they care about - just because it's important to them. Woooowwww.... Welp. Needless to say I said thanks and but didn't need their help. I even told him with a sarcastic smile that I would go find somebody else who know how to take all of it off. And I walked away.
In the hunt for someone who actually knew about computers, I got a lot of very generous offers to help fix it or to help extract data (which is all I need) - all of which I have extremely appreciated, truly. However, one that I figure I could trust over all of those who have asked - not because of relations, but because of skill - my compter and its data is in the hands of the son of one of my professors. His son is currently working in computer engineering and can "work magic if you put anything with a motherboard in front of him" according to one recommending source. So hopefully he will be able to at least get my data off and possibly even find out what's wrong with it so that I can send it in to HP and have them cover whatever is wrong with my warranty. My computer is less than a year old, and I'm really upset with what happened to it :( I still trust HP, because every company has falty computers - yes, even Apple. I am looking completely forward to getting my computer back!!!! And actually use it again!!!!
Until then, though, I will have limited access to computers and the internet and I will be spending most of my time studying for exams or spending time with friends and family. There have been really great bonuses to not having a computer - I have been missing out on a lot of life staying stuck behind my laptop screen, and now that it's not there, peace, God, friends, fiance, and family are so present in my life - moreso than before. It's been hard, but it has been peaceful not having the buzz of what I should do on my computer next on my mind. So until next time!
Jessica
It kept freezing up and the only way to unfreeze it was to force a shut down. After a few weeks of this happening, I opened a word document for class and it froze... I got upset. Forced a shut down. Flipped it over. Pulled out the battery. Unplugged it from the wall. then I took a breath...... Plugged it back in. Put the battery back in. Turned it back on.... "Your hard disk does not exist"..... Me: whhhhaaaaattt!?!?!?! It was just there!!!
So... I took it to Best Buy to see if there was anything to be done. They let me know that if it was still under warranty, they would be able to send it in to HP and either my deffective motherboard or my defective hard drive would be replaced for free. Or both if both were the problem. Phew! My warranty runs out at the end of December!! Great, so how much would it cost to extract my data? I have so much that I don't want to risk losing if they replace something. "$220" O.O Are you kidding me??? I asked him, "why does it cost so much?" His reply: "People love their data. It's important to people." I laughed (at) him and said, "woooww... that's really wrong...." :) So basically, greed is evident even in a squad of geeks. Taking advantage of people who have things they care about - just because it's important to them. Woooowwww.... Welp. Needless to say I said thanks and but didn't need their help. I even told him with a sarcastic smile that I would go find somebody else who know how to take all of it off. And I walked away.
In the hunt for someone who actually knew about computers, I got a lot of very generous offers to help fix it or to help extract data (which is all I need) - all of which I have extremely appreciated, truly. However, one that I figure I could trust over all of those who have asked - not because of relations, but because of skill - my compter and its data is in the hands of the son of one of my professors. His son is currently working in computer engineering and can "work magic if you put anything with a motherboard in front of him" according to one recommending source. So hopefully he will be able to at least get my data off and possibly even find out what's wrong with it so that I can send it in to HP and have them cover whatever is wrong with my warranty. My computer is less than a year old, and I'm really upset with what happened to it :( I still trust HP, because every company has falty computers - yes, even Apple. I am looking completely forward to getting my computer back!!!! And actually use it again!!!!
Until then, though, I will have limited access to computers and the internet and I will be spending most of my time studying for exams or spending time with friends and family. There have been really great bonuses to not having a computer - I have been missing out on a lot of life staying stuck behind my laptop screen, and now that it's not there, peace, God, friends, fiance, and family are so present in my life - moreso than before. It's been hard, but it has been peaceful not having the buzz of what I should do on my computer next on my mind. So until next time!
Jessica
Monday, November 5, 2012
Last Minute Thoughts About Tomorrow's Election
As we all know, tomorrow is a big day for the United States. Beginning at 7am, polls will be opened for every American citizen to make their voice somewhat heard concerning who they would trust most with the running of our country. This election, our two candidates are Mitt Romney and Barack Obama - current President.
Who am I voting for? I will not share; both candidates have a lot of good points, shady pieces of their history, and some really crappy responses to questions. Both are human and I either like both or like neither. Not one over the other. However, I am voting - that part is for sure.
I have friends who feel the election is really no big deal and it's not "really important" to cote because it doesn't really matter in the end. While I might agree with the fact that I don't necessarily agree with the way we go about our elections, I am an American-born citizen and therefore have responsibilities.
In high school, in my Gov & Econ class with Mr. Skaris, I learned most importantly that we have rights. We have freedoms no other country has, we have protections so many people wish they have, and we have rights and amendments like no other. I may not be very patriotic about the country I live in, but I am thankful for the benefits we have that others envy us for. The same friends that don't think it's important to vote argue in situations, "It's my right! I have the right do fill-in-the-blank because I'm an American!" as well as other statements. However, they don't seem to truly understand anything about being an American citizen besides the fact that we have the freedom of speech.
As American citizens we are called in duty to three things: paying taxes, being willing to join arms in dyer emergency, and vote. We can speak freely, be gay freely, have sex freely, go to church freely, wear anything freely, go to school freely, do dumb stuff freely, whatever we really want to within reason freely. No, I don't necessarily approve or agree with some of the things we are free to do, but the point is: as long as we're in this country, nothing is stopping us from doing so.
I go to a Bible college where one of our main "textbooks" is the the Holy Bible - the inspired Word of God. Anywhere else in the world, I would have been dead a long time ago. I am thankful for the fact that I, as a woman and Christ-follower, have the opportunity to access such great things. Sadly though, some of my friends even here at this school don't see the point of carrying out civic duty when called to do so.
You see, the United States of America - while flawed - tries to cater to the needs of the people, even if it doesn't always seem so. We have alllllllll these opportunities to grow and transcend to a higher state of being in society. And yet, all this country asks us for in return are three things: pay taxes, be willing to take up arms if necessary (which obviously we have never really had to worry about), and vote. VOTE. One of only three things that we are asked of in return for all the protection and freedom assured us. One of the simplest forms of service to the country: drive down the road and vote in each election. It's really not that big of a deal to do. You see?
While I have absolutely no say over the people of this country, I think it's our responsibility to have some unbiased knowledge of what is going on in politics that concern us as the people. I, myself, have no true care for politics in any way. Most times, I could care less. But I know that electing a new president or re-electing a current president has everything in the world to do with me, so I learn just enough to have an idea of who would best represent me. I've heard it said that "neither of the candidates represent me." Well, in this election, neither of the candidates entirely represent me either for many reasons. But that doesn't mean I can just toss it aside. One of them has views that more represent me than not, and that's the one I think could possibly do well in office. Point is, I am an American citizen, and if I am to claim this, I need to act and live like one responsibly: vote!
Another thing is this: "I think Obama can make great change in our country!" or "I think Romney can do a better job than Obama!" Truth is, both of them will do only a mediocre job in office because they are two different ends of the spectrum. You cannot expect some great enlightening change from any president ever to come into office: they will do things their way and in the way THEY think is best for the United States. You cannot truly believe that one will do better than the other like they try to make you believe, they will simply do it different from one another.
These are way last minute, but I want to get it out for those of you who think you're not voting tomorrow. Remember, if you don't vote, you have no right to complain about who's in office.
Who am I voting for? I will not share; both candidates have a lot of good points, shady pieces of their history, and some really crappy responses to questions. Both are human and I either like both or like neither. Not one over the other. However, I am voting - that part is for sure.
I have friends who feel the election is really no big deal and it's not "really important" to cote because it doesn't really matter in the end. While I might agree with the fact that I don't necessarily agree with the way we go about our elections, I am an American-born citizen and therefore have responsibilities.
In high school, in my Gov & Econ class with Mr. Skaris, I learned most importantly that we have rights. We have freedoms no other country has, we have protections so many people wish they have, and we have rights and amendments like no other. I may not be very patriotic about the country I live in, but I am thankful for the benefits we have that others envy us for. The same friends that don't think it's important to vote argue in situations, "It's my right! I have the right do fill-in-the-blank because I'm an American!" as well as other statements. However, they don't seem to truly understand anything about being an American citizen besides the fact that we have the freedom of speech.
As American citizens we are called in duty to three things: paying taxes, being willing to join arms in dyer emergency, and vote. We can speak freely, be gay freely, have sex freely, go to church freely, wear anything freely, go to school freely, do dumb stuff freely, whatever we really want to within reason freely. No, I don't necessarily approve or agree with some of the things we are free to do, but the point is: as long as we're in this country, nothing is stopping us from doing so.
I go to a Bible college where one of our main "textbooks" is the the Holy Bible - the inspired Word of God. Anywhere else in the world, I would have been dead a long time ago. I am thankful for the fact that I, as a woman and Christ-follower, have the opportunity to access such great things. Sadly though, some of my friends even here at this school don't see the point of carrying out civic duty when called to do so.
You see, the United States of America - while flawed - tries to cater to the needs of the people, even if it doesn't always seem so. We have alllllllll these opportunities to grow and transcend to a higher state of being in society. And yet, all this country asks us for in return are three things: pay taxes, be willing to take up arms if necessary (which obviously we have never really had to worry about), and vote. VOTE. One of only three things that we are asked of in return for all the protection and freedom assured us. One of the simplest forms of service to the country: drive down the road and vote in each election. It's really not that big of a deal to do. You see?
While I have absolutely no say over the people of this country, I think it's our responsibility to have some unbiased knowledge of what is going on in politics that concern us as the people. I, myself, have no true care for politics in any way. Most times, I could care less. But I know that electing a new president or re-electing a current president has everything in the world to do with me, so I learn just enough to have an idea of who would best represent me. I've heard it said that "neither of the candidates represent me." Well, in this election, neither of the candidates entirely represent me either for many reasons. But that doesn't mean I can just toss it aside. One of them has views that more represent me than not, and that's the one I think could possibly do well in office. Point is, I am an American citizen, and if I am to claim this, I need to act and live like one responsibly: vote!
Another thing is this: "I think Obama can make great change in our country!" or "I think Romney can do a better job than Obama!" Truth is, both of them will do only a mediocre job in office because they are two different ends of the spectrum. You cannot expect some great enlightening change from any president ever to come into office: they will do things their way and in the way THEY think is best for the United States. You cannot truly believe that one will do better than the other like they try to make you believe, they will simply do it different from one another.
These are way last minute, but I want to get it out for those of you who think you're not voting tomorrow. Remember, if you don't vote, you have no right to complain about who's in office.
Thursday, October 11, 2012
{Matt & Kim: Live}
For Brooke's 20th birthday, I took her to see Matt & Kim live in Charlotte at the Fillmore, opened by Oberhofer. It was amazing!!! This was our face afterwards ;)
Monday, October 1, 2012
October Photo-a-Day Challenge: Accepted.
One of the blogs I follow is of a mum from Australia under the blogger name of Fat Mum Slim. Each month, at the beginning of the month, she posts a challenge to improve upon and have fun with photography at least once a day for every day of the month. I've considered taking part in it before, but I think this month, I will take it seriously ;) I'm definitely not pro at photography in any way. I do own a Nikon D70 (it's a few years old) and it has a really big lens on it that I obviously have no idea what model it is (or whatever). So in an effort to be encouraged in way of taking at least semi-good photos, I accept the challenge for the month of October. (I hope I can keep this up, so keep me accountable!) This is the link to her blog to learn more about her and the details of her challenge. This is what I will be photographing over the next 31 days:
October photo a day challenge: Everything you need to know!
Even if you don't have a massive camera like I do, you can still participate! These are the only rules:
How to play
1. Look at the list each day, and discover the daily prompt.
2. Grab your camera – your phone or another camera – and take a photo using the daily prompt as inspiration.
3. Upload your photo to where ever you like: Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, Flickr, Tumblr, your blog or anywhere you please. {If sharing on Twitter or Instagram add the hashtag #FMSphotoaday}
2. Grab your camera – your phone or another camera – and take a photo using the daily prompt as inspiration.
3. Upload your photo to where ever you like: Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, Flickr, Tumblr, your blog or anywhere you please. {If sharing on Twitter or Instagram add the hashtag #FMSphotoaday}
This is extra, explanitory information on how you are to approach each day (in case you're confised about what exactly you are taking a picture of:
The Prompts
1. Where you stood: Take a photo of where you’re standing.
2. Lunchtime: Take a photo of your lunch, or around you at lunchtime.
3. This happened today: What’s something that happened today? Shoot it and share it.
4. What you read: Did you read a sign? Are you reading a book? A blog? Shoot and share.
5. Shadow: Take a photo of your shadow or any shadow.
6. I’m thankful for…: What are you thankful for today? It can be simple or BIG. Share it.
7. Light: You can shoot sunflare, a streetlight, light from the sun… any kind of light.
8. Angle: Look at angles in buildings, structures, books, anything. Find an angle and take a photo.
9. Red: Take a photo of something red.
10. Emotion: Happy. Sad. Angry. Overjoyed and so on and so forth. Be creative.
11. Something close-up: These photos might be a little mysterious. Take a photo of something really close-up.
12. On the table: Last month we did table, but this month let’s do ON the table. What’s on your table?
13. Landscape: Take a photo of the skyline, a landscape you see.
14. Makes you laugh: What’s something funny that makes you laugh. Share it.
15. Dinnertime: Just like lunchtime, only later. Take a picture of what dinnertime is like on this day for you.
16. Something you wrote: Take a photo of something you wrote or drew.
17. Fruit: Take a photo of a piece of fruit, or a few.
18. Made you smile today: What made you smile today? Find it. Shoot it. Share it.
19. Letters: Take a photo of letters. They might make up a poster, or something bigger. Or even be mail?
20. 4 o’clock: Take a photo a 4am or 4pm – whatever you’re doing at that time.
21. Calm: Take a photo of something that makes you feel calm, or represents calm.
22. In your town: Take a photo of something from where you live. It might be a building, people, park or something else.
23. The view from here: Take a photo of your view from where you are. It might be your office, your home, traveling. The everyday can sometimes be very interesting.
24. Weather: Take a photo of the weather today. Let’s travel around the world with everyone’s weather photos.
25. People: It might be people you know or people you don’t. Take a photo of people.
26. Listening to: What are you listening to? Music? Children laughing? Share it.
27. Morning: Take a photo of your morning.
28. Looking back: Take a photo of something from your past, or from just behind you. Look back and take a photo.
29. Moon: The moon is just about full tonight. Take a photo.
30. Clothes: Take a photo of clothes. Perhaps what you’re wearing, or in your wardrobe, on a mannequin or otherwise.
31. Whatever you please: Are you celebrating Halloween tonight? Perhaps take a photo of that. Today is free choice – take a photo of ANYTHING you like.
2. Lunchtime: Take a photo of your lunch, or around you at lunchtime.
3. This happened today: What’s something that happened today? Shoot it and share it.
4. What you read: Did you read a sign? Are you reading a book? A blog? Shoot and share.
5. Shadow: Take a photo of your shadow or any shadow.
6. I’m thankful for…: What are you thankful for today? It can be simple or BIG. Share it.
7. Light: You can shoot sunflare, a streetlight, light from the sun… any kind of light.
8. Angle: Look at angles in buildings, structures, books, anything. Find an angle and take a photo.
9. Red: Take a photo of something red.
10. Emotion: Happy. Sad. Angry. Overjoyed and so on and so forth. Be creative.
11. Something close-up: These photos might be a little mysterious. Take a photo of something really close-up.
12. On the table: Last month we did table, but this month let’s do ON the table. What’s on your table?
13. Landscape: Take a photo of the skyline, a landscape you see.
14. Makes you laugh: What’s something funny that makes you laugh. Share it.
15. Dinnertime: Just like lunchtime, only later. Take a picture of what dinnertime is like on this day for you.
16. Something you wrote: Take a photo of something you wrote or drew.
17. Fruit: Take a photo of a piece of fruit, or a few.
18. Made you smile today: What made you smile today? Find it. Shoot it. Share it.
19. Letters: Take a photo of letters. They might make up a poster, or something bigger. Or even be mail?
20. 4 o’clock: Take a photo a 4am or 4pm – whatever you’re doing at that time.
21. Calm: Take a photo of something that makes you feel calm, or represents calm.
22. In your town: Take a photo of something from where you live. It might be a building, people, park or something else.
23. The view from here: Take a photo of your view from where you are. It might be your office, your home, traveling. The everyday can sometimes be very interesting.
24. Weather: Take a photo of the weather today. Let’s travel around the world with everyone’s weather photos.
25. People: It might be people you know or people you don’t. Take a photo of people.
26. Listening to: What are you listening to? Music? Children laughing? Share it.
27. Morning: Take a photo of your morning.
28. Looking back: Take a photo of something from your past, or from just behind you. Look back and take a photo.
29. Moon: The moon is just about full tonight. Take a photo.
30. Clothes: Take a photo of clothes. Perhaps what you’re wearing, or in your wardrobe, on a mannequin or otherwise.
31. Whatever you please: Are you celebrating Halloween tonight? Perhaps take a photo of that. Today is free choice – take a photo of ANYTHING you like.
So, obviously, I copied the majority of her post... But I give full credit to the lovely lady down-under. Check out her blog: Fat Mum Slim! And have fun photographing!
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